Who needs all that writin’ and ‘rithmatic anyway?

by Brian Keaney

I’ve got a couple half written blog posts waiting to be finished before they can be posted, some dating back a couple months. I’ve got a couple dozen more nearly fully formed in my head, but still haven’t been put on paper, or keyboards, or whatever. I’m actually kind of sick that way. I will usually have a first draft nearly written before I ever sit in front of a computer.

One of the major raison d’etre of this blog is to improve my writing. Good people pay me good money to write, and since I’m rarely happy with anything I give them I figure the least I can do is actively work to get better at it. In August I said I was going to try and write more but shorter posts, and to some extent I’ve succeeded, even if it’s been in fits and stops. I’m going to try and be more consistent, even if it means very short posts. No one has ever accused me of being brief, so I figure that’s something else to work on.

One of my favorite clients has a blog that I check out from time to time. Her coworkers are frequent topics of discussion and they are all cool people, so I enjoy seeing what they’ve been up to. Mostly she cracks me up, and I’m impressed she’s able to keep things so concise. Here I am trying to write about how I want to write more short posts and I’m already three paragraphs deep without getting to the point.

This client actually blogged about me the other day and said I was better at PR than I was at biology. Mr Bullerwell, my high school biology teacher, has never seen my PR work, but I’m certain he would agree anyway. Oh well, they don’t pay us for our biology skills, and anyway she said my boss and I are “two of [her] favorite PR peeps.”

So, in honor of AW and in an attempt at brevity, here’s a quick anecdote that kept most (but certainly not all) of my family in fits of laughter last night:

I was editing KK’s paper for her nursing class. I was told just to look for the big things, and not get too deep into corrections. I was about three lines in when I saw a sentence that certainly qualified as having a “big thing” problem with it.

Me: I don’t know what this says. This sentence doesn’t even have a verb in it.
KK: Why? Does every sentence have to have a one? What is a verb anyway?

We all laughed at her, and she got mad. She got even madder when my mother pointed out that it ranked up there with the time she got off the plane and asked, “Is today tomorrow or yesterday?”

Then KK pointed out that she had the least amount of education in the room and yet still made the most money. Moral of the story: Stay out of school, kids.